Samuel Seibert

• Who would benefit from reading this book? Someone who is willing to conduct a piercing evaluation of behaviors that could be holding them back personally and professionally. 

• Time to Read: I was able to read this book in about two weeks. 

• Pages & Highlights: 220 Pages, and I found 74 passages worth highlighting.

• Structure: Goldsmith breaks this book into four parts.
  • Part one- The delusions that can accompany success.

   

  • Part two- 20+1 habits that prevent executives from getting to the next level.

   

  • Part three- 7 behavioral habits to help you move past the hindering habit.

   

  • Part four- How to work through the process of changing your behavioral pitfalls if you are in high leadership.

   

• Thesis: Don’t be deceived!  Just because you’ve been successful in the past does not mean that everything you do is “golden.” Evaluate yourself and start changing now so that your career does not hit a wall.

Summary
 
 
     Marshall Goldsmith digs into why some successful people stall in their professional advancement, and details his work helping said professionals. Goldsmith shares that as one moves higher in an organization, specific technical skills are a given, and interpersonal dynamics guides the course of careers.

Goldsmith provides a thoughtful list of 20 + 1 hindering interpersonal habits that he has seen waylay professionals on their career path.  
 
     Rather than simply stating, “you’re a jerk and you should change,” Goldsmith walks through the guidance he provides his clients on changing the hindering habit they have.
 
     My favorite part was the detailed list of habits. That helped me process through the harmful habits I have, and how I can focus my efforts to grow personally and professionally.
 
 
Top Three  Quotations
 
 
1.) “One of the greatest mistakes of successful people is the assumption, “I am successful. I behave this way. Therefore, I must be successful because I behave this way!” The challenge is to make them see that sometimes they are successful in spite of this behavior.”

– Marshall Goldsmith, loc. 582
 
Our brains can zoom in so specifically on weaknesses, that we don’t think critically about our personal and professional strengths. I like that Goldsmith’s statement presents a challenge to critically consider why we achieved success in a given area. What’s being described is the logical fallacy, “post hoc ergo propter hoc“,  thinking that because we are a know-it-all and successful, that the reason we were successful was because we are a know-it-all. Instead, Marshall points out, that we are successful in spite of that detrimental trait.
 
     When critical thinking isn’t applied to success we can snowball positive and negative behaviors together and over time accumulate skewed feedback on what leads to our success.
 
Before even getting getting to some of the 20+1 habits discussed in the second part of the book, it’s worth camping out on this one idea: “What do I do that contributes to my success?”
 
 
2.) “6. Telling the world how smart we are: The need to show people we’re smarter than they think we are.“

– Marshall Goldsmith, loc 981 (Habit No. 6 of the 20+1 hindering habits)
 
 
The hindering habit that whispered to me was, No. 6.
 
     The nuance I appreciated about Marshall’s wording of habit No. 6 was the need “to show people we’re smarter than they think we are.”
 
People might already think we are smart.

They might even think we are smarter than them.

My itch is to constantly reassert how smart I am.
 
     Growing up I was told by well meaning adults, “You are so mature for your age.” As a young adult I was given positive feedback on “being smart.” Because of these influences, habit No. 6 resonated with me. I could see that my desiring to remind others of my cleverness and brilliance was coming from a place of insecurity.
 
     I like that Goldsmith pointed out that it is not about trying to show someone that you are smarter than them, but playing a game of constant one-upmanship  with yourself that damages relationships.
 
 
I’d wager that if you read this book you would find your habit uncomfortably staring you down.
 
 
3.) “Instruction is usually appropriate, to a point. It’s the difference between someone giving you simple directions to their house and telling you every wrong turn you can make along the way.”

– Marshall Goldsmith, loc. 2495
 
 
Goldsmith is referencing someone who over shares. As someone who enjoys providing lots of details I found the admonishment to be a helpful reminder that 75% of the people in world do not want as much detail as I am eager to provide. I heard a definition once that a gracious person is one who, “holds a little bit back.” I might be reserved with my emotional displays, but I’m not at all reserved about work and informational sharing.
 
What do you tend to share a bit too much of?
 
 
Overall
 
 
I think this book is very valuable because if you have one of the hindering habits holding back your career, you probably don’t even realize it. You might even think the bad habit is part of what is fueling your success. The truth may be that you are clinging to an anchor that is sinking your career.
 

Challenge